Thursday, February 26, 2009

Something in the water?


As everyone got up to break for lunch at a recent council meeting I was covering, I had an embarrassing moment of feeling as if I might faint. Apparently it showed on my face, because before I could sit myself back down, several councilors were kindly offering me water, a cool cloth etc.

I quickly felt better and chalked it up to dehydration, hunger or most likely, the sheer oxygen absorbing ennui of sitting through yet another 6-hour meeting detailing how many rogue wild turkeys were apprehended by animal control this month, council's difficulties with their email system and other fun facts.

One of the councilors, however, took a flying leap to quite another conclusion.

"You'd tell Auntie *Mabel if you were pregnant, right?"

Um, no relative stranger/ council woman, I would not. *Goes home and burns empire waist top.

I don't know if it's just a small-town phenomenon or if it's specific to where I am or maybe just something that goes along with being 23, but since I've arrived here, the activity of my womb has been an apparently acceptable conversation topic in more instances than I'm comfortable with.

The women at my office seem especially anxious to induct me into their ranks of motherhood.

Seemingly innocuous comments such as, "I'm a little tired," "I could really go for a sandwich," or "Hey look, a spider!" prompt exclamations of "OMG! You're pregnant!"

I've tried explaining that I don't plan on having kids anytime soon. But my protestations of debt, long-distance/not-interested-in-having-kids boyfriend, serious health risks (like death), or you know, the fact that I don't feel like it right now, are, for the most part met with a quick blink and: "But you're the perfect age to start having babies!"

Ohhhhh. The perfect age, well, when you put it that way...No.

12 comments:

quarter-life lady. said...

Lol. I can beat those ladies up, if you want me to. One time I was told that I have the perfect hips to have babies. I don't know what's worse. Being told you're the perfect age or being told you have the perfect [large] hips.

Andhari said...

I could go smack any people who told me so. That's not nice.

Michelle said...

While out for dinner with an older, she could be my mother, friend, she exclaimed "maybe you're pregnant," all because I didn't eat all of the chicken in my pasta. Sheesh... I just didn't like the chicken.

sarahdotcom said...

Hahaha, oh the small town life, eh?

Then you move to the big city and the perfect age to have children suddenly jumps up 10 years because YOU'RE THE PERFECT AGE TO BE WORKING YOUR BUTT OFF!

long-distance boyfriend-father would be a little tricky anyhow ;)

Mari said...

Oh, who needs a father, Sarah? Look how well Octomom is doing... and who needs to go on living, anyhow... lol

People annoy me, the minute you date someone, it's "when are you getting married?" and then if you do get married, "when are you having a baby?"

Get a life, people!

btw-where'd you steal that cute baby in the pic?

Anonymous said...

I swear to god, it's so strange. Sometimes I think that they are so different than us, being from a different era, that they try and bond with the only part of us they recognize - our wombs. *chuckle* I just tell them I'm allergic. To babies.

Courtney Elizabeth said...

Hey thanks for the add on 20SB! And ugh I don't want to be be pregnant til I'm closer to 30 that 20. And what's with random old ladies sticking "Auntie" in front of their name?

Anonymous said...

Ahh that lady is so rude! I hate that you can't just wear empire wasted clothing in peace!

Unknown said...

lol ...hey look, a spider! ..you MUST be knocked up!!! love it.

Sarah said...

Quarter-life: Thanks for the offer. They're not so bad really. Next time someone tells you you have the perfect hips for giving birth, just smile sweetly and say, "Thanks, you have a perfect face for radio."

lolita: haha. Yeah, I don't think they're trying to be mean. They're just a little baby-obsessed or something.

Michelle: Oh dear. haha. I can just picture that. I'm glad I'm not the only one this happens to.

Sarahbelle: Exactly! I really don't remember this happening nearly as often if ever when I lived in a larger city.

Mari:You're so right. I'm not sure what's holding me back. lol. And that adorable baby belongs to the brother of one of my best friends. That picture and the look on her face always cracks me up.

Anonymous said...

I understand! I had the flu for a few weeks (yep weeks, I wanted to die!) I was in a class for my masters program and had to get up and run to the restroom. When I came back the whole class was buzzing. Someone decided I was pregnant and spread that around in the ten minutes I was gone. Awesome.

Roshan said...

Lol, loved this post! The ladies probably want something to talk about and babies excite them a lot. It's the same everywhere, Canada or India.